Yes, it can be considered a red flag if your boyfriend is still talking to his ex and has feelings for her. Here are a few reasons why this situation might raise concerns:
Emotional attachment: If your boyfriend still has feelings for his ex, it indicates that there is an emotional attachment present. This can be problematic as it may interfere with the emotional intimacy and commitment that should be present in your current relationship.
Jealousy and insecurity: Knowing that your partner has lingering feelings for someone else can lead to feelings of jealousy and insecurity in the relationship. It can create doubts about your partner's commitment to you and may affect your trust in the relationship.
Difficulty moving on: If your boyfriend is still holding onto feelings for his ex, it suggests that he may not have fully moved on from that past relationship. This can hinder the growth and development of your relationship together.
Potential for rekindling: If your boyfriend is actively maintaining contact with his ex and has feelings for her, there is a risk that the two might rekindle their romantic relationship. This leaves you vulnerable to being hurt and may lead to the end of your current relationship.
Lack of boundaries: Healthy relationships require appropriate boundaries with ex-partners. If your boyfriend's communication with his ex is excessive or crosses the line into emotional intimacy, it could be a sign that he is not establishing appropriate boundaries.
It's essential to have open and honest communication with your boyfriend about your concerns. Share how you feel and ask him about his feelings and intentions regarding his ex. Honest communication can help you both understand each other's perspectives and work towards a resolution.
Ultimately, what you consider a red flag depends on your personal boundaries and comfort levels in a relationship. Some individuals may be more accepting of their partner maintaining contact with an ex, while others may find it too challenging to handle. It's crucial to assess your own needs and emotional well-being in the relationship and determine what is best for you moving forward.