In families where there is a scapegoat and a golden child, there is often a complex and dysfunctional dynamic at play. The scapegoat is typically the family member who is blamed for most, if not all, of the family's problems and conflicts. They may be constantly criticized, belittled, and made to feel inadequate or at fault for various issues within the family.
On the other hand, the golden child is often favored and praised by the parents or other family members. They can do little wrong in the eyes of their parents, and their accomplishments and positive traits are exaggerated while their flaws are minimized or overlooked.
Throughout childhood, the scapegoat and golden child may have a strained relationship. The golden child may be encouraged to join in on the scapegoating, leading to resentment and rivalry between them. The scapegoat may feel neglected, unloved, and jealous of the attention and favoritism bestowed upon the golden child.
In some cases, the golden child may internalize the role given to them by the family and become entitled, lacking empathy towards the scapegoat, and seeing themselves as superior. This can create ongoing tension and animosity between the two roles, leading to a difficult relationship that persists into adulthood.
As adults, the dynamics can continue to impact their relationship. The scapegoat may carry emotional scars from their childhood experiences, leading to challenges in forming healthy relationships or struggling with self-esteem and self-worth issues. The golden child may also face challenges, such as difficulties in forming authentic connections with others or feeling pressured to maintain an image of perfection.
It's essential to recognize that family dynamics can be complex, and individual experiences may vary. If you identify with the scapegoat or golden child role and find that it is affecting your well-being, seeking support from a therapist or counselor can be beneficial in processing these experiences and fostering personal growth.