It's essential to recognize that I don't have the full context of your relationship, so the following are general considerations and not specific advice for your situation.
There could be various reasons why your boyfriend behaves this way, and it may be helpful to reflect on the dynamics of your relationship and consider seeking professional advice from a therapist or counselor for a more in-depth analysis. That being said, here are some potential reasons for his behavior:
Defensiveness: Your boyfriend might become defensive when you express your feelings because he feels criticized or attacked. He might not want to confront his behavior and prefers to avoid responsibility for any harm caused.
Emotional Immaturity: It's possible that your boyfriend struggles to handle emotions constructively and may react with anger instead of understanding or empathy.
Control and Power: Sometimes, individuals may treat their partners poorly to maintain control and power in the relationship. Reacting with anger when you complain might be a way to assert dominance.
Communication Issues: Poor communication skills can lead to misunderstandings and escalation of conflicts. If both of you are not effectively communicating your feelings and needs, it can result in negative reactions.
Low Self-Esteem: People with low self-esteem might put others down to feel better about themselves. When confronted with the consequences of their actions, they might feel threatened and respond angrily.
Avoidance of Responsibility: Your boyfriend may feel uncomfortable acknowledging his behavior's impact and prefers to shift blame instead of taking responsibility.
Unresolved Personal Issues: Personal struggles, traumas, or unresolved issues from the past might influence how your boyfriend treats you and reacts to your complaints.
Regardless of the reasons, it's crucial to prioritize your well-being and emotional health. If your boyfriend's behavior is causing you distress and he is unwilling to address the issues, it may be time to consider whether this relationship is healthy for you.
Healthy relationships are built on trust, respect, open communication, and empathy. If you find yourself in a relationship where you feel consistently mistreated or invalidated, it's essential to evaluate if it's a relationship worth maintaining. Consider seeking support from friends, family, or a therapist to help you navigate through these challenges. Your feelings and emotional needs are valid, and you deserve to be treated with kindness and respect in any relationship.