Addressing this situation with tact and consideration for your friend's feelings is important. Here are some suggestions on how to approach the conversation:
Be positive and appreciative: Start by expressing how much you enjoy spending time with your friend. Let her know that you value your friendship and cherish the moments you share.
Set a time expectation beforehand: If you know she tends to stay longer than you'd like, try to set a loose timeframe before she arrives. You can mention that you have some plans later in the day or need to attend to something at a specific time. This way, she may be more mindful of the time she spends at your place.
Be proactive: As her visit approaches the expected end time, gently mention that you have some other commitments or tasks you need to attend to. This can subtly indicate that her visit is drawing to a close.
Create a signal: Agree on a subtle signal or code word that you can use to let her know when it's time to wrap up the visit. This can be something discreet that only you both understand, so it doesn't come across as abrupt.
Offer alternatives: If you sense that she might be staying longer because she enjoys spending time with you, suggest other activities you can do together on different occasions. This way, she knows that you still want to hang out but in a more balanced manner.
Take breaks: During her visit, find opportunities to take short breaks or engage in separate activities. This can help create natural pauses and let her know that the visit doesn't have to be continuous.
Use "I" statements: When discussing the situation, use "I" statements to express your feelings and needs. For example, "I really enjoy our time together, but sometimes I need some personal space after a few hours."
Be honest but gentle: If she asks directly about the visit's length or if there's any issue, be honest, but try to frame it in a way that shows you're considering both her feelings and yours. You can say something like, "I hope you don't mind me mentioning this, but sometimes I find it a bit challenging to balance my schedule when our visits go on for extended periods. I hope you understand."
Remember that communication is key, and open dialogue can lead to a better understanding of each other's boundaries. Your friend is likely to appreciate your honesty and respectfulness in addressing the situation.