Experiencing a change in emotional response to past trauma is not uncommon, and it can happen for various reasons. It's essential to recognize that everyone's healing journey is unique, and different factors can contribute to shifts in emotional reactions over time. Here are some possible reasons for the change you described:
Healing and Coping: Over time, with healing and therapy, some individuals find healthier ways to cope with and process their traumatic experiences. As they develop new coping mechanisms and emotional resilience, the intensity of their PTSD symptoms may lessen or change.
Empowerment: As survivors of abuse move forward in their healing journey, they may start to regain a sense of control and empowerment over their lives. This newfound strength can lead to a shift from feeling overwhelmed by fear or anxiety to feeling anger towards the abuser or the situation, which may be a more empowering emotion for some.
Cognitive Processing: As therapy and healing progress, individuals may start to process the trauma differently cognitively. They may begin to see the abuse as an injustice, and their anger might be directed at the perpetrator rather than themselves or the traumatic event.
Time and Distance: As more time passes between the traumatic event and the present, the emotional impact may change. Memories might lose some of their emotional intensity, allowing for a shift in emotional response.
Supportive Environment: Having a supportive network of friends, family, or therapists can greatly influence the healing process. Feeling understood, validated, and supported can help survivors in their recovery and may contribute to changes in emotional responses.
Gaining Perspective: As you grow and evolve, your perspective on the past can change. You might have gained insights into the dynamics of the abusive relationship, which could lead to a change in your emotional response.
It's worth noting that these changes in emotional response can vary from person to person, and some survivors may continue to experience PTSD symptoms even as they work through their trauma. Every individual's experience with trauma and healing is unique, and there is no one-size-fits-all response to abuse or PTSD.
If you find that your anger is causing distress or is difficult to manage, consider speaking with a therapist or counselor. They can help you process these emotions and provide support as you continue on your healing journey. Remember that seeking help is a sign of strength, and healing is possible with the right support and resources.