Question

Why would my wife's colleague call her late at night when she's on holiday leave, then unlike all her other colleagues, she refuses to answer the calls in front of me instead just blocks the number. Am I paranoid or is it suspicious?

Answer 1

It's understandable that you might feel concerned or suspicious about your wife's colleague calling her late at night during her holiday leave and her behavior of blocking the number rather than answering the calls in front of you. While it's essential to avoid jumping to conclusions, it's also essential to address any concerns you have in a healthy and open way.

Here are a few potential explanations for the situation:

1. Work-Related Emergency: There could be a genuine work-related emergency or urgent matter that the colleague needs to discuss with your wife, even during her holiday leave.

2. Inappropriate Intentions: On the other hand, the colleague might have inappropriate intentions, and the late-night calls could be a sign of boundary crossing or a potential affair.

3. Privacy Concerns: Your wife might be blocking the number to maintain her privacy and avoid any possible misunderstandings or conflicts with you. She may feel that the colleague's calls are inappropriate and doesn't want to deal with them in your presence.

4. Fear of Misinterpretation: Your wife might be concerned that you would misinterpret the situation or get upset, even if there's nothing inappropriate happening.

To address your concerns:

1. Open Communication: Talk to your wife about your feelings and concerns in a non-accusatory manner. Express that you feel uncomfortable with the situation and would like to understand why she's blocking the calls.

2. Active Listening: Listen to her perspective without assuming the worst. Give her a chance to explain the situation.

3. Trust: Trust is crucial in any relationship. If there's a history of trust issues or infidelity, it's essential to address those underlying issues as well.

4. Boundary Setting: Discuss the boundaries that you both feel comfortable with when it comes to communication with colleagues and friends outside of work hours.

5. Consider Professional Help: If you find it challenging to address your concerns or if there are deeper trust issues in the relationship, consider seeking the help of a couples therapist.

Remember that communication is key in any relationship. It's important to have an open and honest conversation with your wife to gain clarity on the situation and address any concerns or discomfort you may be feeling. Avoid making accusations or jumping to conclusions until you have more information, and try to approach the conversation with empathy and understanding.