Narcissists can be highly manipulative and skilled at maintaining their façade, even when they know they've been discovered. Several motivations could drive a narcissist to keep up the "I love you" charade despite being found out:
Need for Control: Narcissists crave control over their relationships and will do whatever it takes to maintain power and influence over their targets. By continuing the "I love you" act, they can keep the other person emotionally invested and dependent on them, making it easier to manipulate and exploit them.
Fear of Abandonment: Narcissists are deeply afraid of being abandoned or rejected. If they sense that their target is pulling away or distancing themselves after figuring them out, they might intensify the love-bombing and affection to regain their emotional hold on the person.
Maintaining the Ego Boost: Being loved and adored strokes a narcissist's ego and reinforces their sense of self-importance. By continuing the charade, they can continue to feel powerful and admired, which is essential for their self-esteem.
Avoiding Consequences: If a narcissist is engaged in harmful or manipulative behavior, openly admitting the truth could lead to social, personal, or legal consequences. Continuing the "I love you" charade allows them to avoid accountability and maintain a positive image.
Gaslighting and Confusion: Narcissists are known for gaslighting, a manipulative tactic in which they make the other person doubt their perceptions and reality. By insisting on their love while engaging in hurtful behavior, the narcissist can cause confusion and doubt in their target, making it harder for them to leave or confront the narcissist's actions.
Hoovering: This term is used to describe the tactic employed by narcissists to draw their targets back into the relationship after a period of distancing or breakup. By pretending to still love the person, they aim to re-establish control and continue the cycle of manipulation.
Lack of Empathy: Narcissists often lack genuine empathy and emotional connection with others. They may not fully understand or care about the emotional impact their deception has on the other person, making it easier for them to continue with the charade.
Remember that narcissists' motivations can be complex and varied, and their behaviors may not always be rational or predictable. It is essential to protect yourself from emotional manipulation and seek support from friends, family, or professionals if you find yourself entangled with a narcissistic individual.