Whether or not it is considered rude not to invite your coworker out on their birthday depends on the specific dynamics of your relationship and the workplace culture. Here are some considerations to keep in mind:
Reciprocity: In friendships, reciprocity is often an essential aspect. If your coworker has never invited you or bought you a birthday present despite being friends, you may feel that the relationship lacks mutual effort. In such cases, you might feel less inclined to go out of your way to celebrate their birthday.
Personal Boundaries: Inviting someone out on their birthday is a personal decision, and you are not obligated to do so. It's crucial to respect your own boundaries and comfort levels when it comes to social engagements.
Workplace Dynamics: Consider your workplace culture and policies regarding social interactions among colleagues. Some workplaces may encourage or discourage socializing outside of work, and it's essential to be mindful of these norms.
Communication: Open communication is key. If you feel unsure about whether to invite your coworker or not, you can have an honest conversation with them. You can express your feelings and listen to their perspective, which may lead to a better understanding of each other's expectations.
Celebrating in the Workplace: If you are not comfortable going out for a celebration, you can still acknowledge your coworker's birthday at work. You could wish them well, give a small gift or card, or organize a simple celebration in the office, like bringing in treats.
Prioritizing the Friendship: Think about the friendship itself. If the friendship is meaningful to you and you want to maintain it, it might be worth considering celebrating their birthday as a gesture of goodwill.
Ultimately, the decision to invite your coworker out on their birthday should be based on your feelings, the nature of your friendship, and what you believe is appropriate in your workplace setting. It's okay to set boundaries and prioritize your comfort and feelings in any social situation. Remember that every friendship is unique, and what matters most is the understanding and respect you have for each other's choices.